Imagine being a loving father one day, and then waking up the next talking to police and DCF, and being accused of the most heinous crime… against your precious little girl???
And then imagine being kept from her, and her from you, for 8 months…
Being left to wonder what she thinks of your absence?
If she blames you?
What her mother is saying to her?
Left to wonder… and to hurt…
8 months ago marked the beginning, for one of my very best friends, of this continually unfolding nightmare.
I’ve been by his side; I won’t leave his corner.
I answer the late night phone calls when he tosses and turns and can’t get to sleep.
From 889 miles away, I use my words to dry his tears.
I give him every ounce of love I’ve got to give.
My little empathic heart breaks with his, breaks for his little girl who, at a mere 5 years old, is caught in the crossfire of her mother’s malice.
It hurts in my heart, and in my head, to write these words.
It hurts to tell this story… but as I continue to research anything and everything I can about Malicious Mother Syndrome, Father’s Rights , False Allegations of Abuse…
As I come upon story after story of fathers that have been fighting for years, and the countless tens of thousands of dollars spent on legal representation…
As I continue to bear witness to this extraordinary heartache… I will not be silent.
I will keep speaking up, and out.
Nothing Good to Say
I was taught growing up that if I didn’t have anything good to say about someone, it was best not to say anything at all. This story is so close to my heart, and I am often overcome by anger, disgust, and a whole roller coaster ride of emotions I’d rather not experience as I watch this beautiful man that I love hurt, at the hands of a person I have never liked. As I watch him hurt as a direct result of the actions of a person I have never trusted.
Knowing the hurt this is causing his little girl as well, and the damage it is doing to her relationship with her dad…
I have a whole lot of ‘nothing good to say’ about her mama that I’d really like to say here. Loudly. I’d like to text scream it- Caps lock enabled and everything.
That would do the situation no good.
That would merely be me venting.
That would only add more negative energy, and goodness knows there’s plenty of that here.
Instead, I’ll send some energy to hoping that her mama gets the help she clearly needs, so that she can be the mom this wonderful little human deserves.
Instead, I’ll spend some energy painting you a picture…
Imagine facing father’s day without your child, not knowing when you will ever see her again…
Imagine facing father’s day wondering what ideas your ex is putting in her head…
Imagine facing father’s day wondering what your little girl must be wondering about your whereabouts…
Imagine the heartache… the helplessness… the empty feeling in your arms…
Imagine the pancake breakfast you won’t eat… the afternoon you won’t be spending at the beach… the bedtime stories you won’t get to read…
Now, imagine what you can do to help…
Donations, no matter how small, add up… Please consider donating to help with court costs and lawyer’s fees.
Social sharing is so very valuable too, you can share this post and/or the direct link to the Gofundme.
Please help us reach our goal by Father’s Day!
Surviving Father’s Day Without Your Kiddos
If you’re a dad that’s going to be without his wee ones this Father’s Day, here are a few tips for surviving and even making something special of the day….
- Avoid social media, there will be no avoiding Father’s Day there… No need to torture yourself.
- Don’t rely on your guy friends to be a distraction, they’ll likely be busy with their own commitments. Instead, plan some quality alone time… A hike? A drive? A Netflix binge?
- Spend the day with your own father… Send a card or give him a call if you can’t be there in person.
- Call your kiddos… Or better yet, Skype!
- Take a camera with you to document your day, then put together a little digi photo album to share with them. Just because you couldn’t be together in person, doesn’t mean you have to miss out on all the magic of the day.
- Write a letter to them (individually)… talk about your love for them and all the reasons you feel honored to be their dad… your favorite memories from the past year… your hopes and dreams for the year that lay ahead…
- Or perhaps just choose another day altogether to celebrate.
If you’ve got any ideas on how to make something special of the day when you can’t spend it with your kids, please share with us in the comments below.
And don’t forget, if you have a few dollars to spare…. Josh could sure use them.